It's scary how two different people can have such similar backgrounds (minus the lesbian part, that's playing the rural dating game on hard mode for sure). For me I just kept living like a college student and saved most of my paycheck until the adult part of me was able to convince my inner child we were, in fact, safe.
Feeling safe let me leave bad employers in the past. Thankfully my current one is pretty awesome.
Yeah, I was on the track to do what you did, and then I got multiple sclerosis during my last semester of graduate school. Disability is a major player in my own personal negative patterns: My MS came out of nowhere, I can't make good choices to make it go away, and I can't just ignore it. I also was fucked over when I tried to plan for things like student loans: Over half my undergrad debt is from my last year because my dad lost all the money he was using to help me in 08.
My personal experiences, outliers though they are, tell me that change is likely to screw me over. I would love to save my paychecks but when your meds cost 300k+ a year for your entire life, your life is dictated by health insurance and care. I lived like a college student and saved and was STILL fucked by change, so I'm very change and risk averse.
Feeling safe let me leave bad employers in the past. Thankfully my current one is pretty awesome.